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September 2, 2020

The Ultimate Guide to Understand and Create Healthy Boundaries

So a few weeks ago I was talking about boundaries with my best friend. She was in the process of creating boundaries and figuring out how to approach it without seeming rude. The truth is, when you are creating healthy boundaries, you are creating them for you. I’m going to talk about what healthy boundaries actually are, why you need them, and how to create them!

What are Healthy Boundaries?

So, what are healthy boundaries? Healthy boundaries are limits you set for yourself to protect yourself. They explain how far you are willing to go in certain situations, or in interactions with other people. Healthy boundaries can be established in both personal and professional settings.

Why are Boundaries Important?

While we mostly choose who we interact with, we cannot always choose where we are. You also cannot judge a person based on how they were raised, which is why boundaries are ideal. Boundaries can help show others what is okay, what is not okay, and it can help you respond to certain situations as well.

Boundaries can also help you feel more secure in who you are. They are able to help you gain clarity on who you are, what you stand for, and what you want to be doing with your life. Boundaries may also enhance your feelings of empowerment!

What Do You Need to Create Boundaries?

In order to create your own healthy boundaries, there are just a few things you need. The first thing you need is to have set goals, limits, and an awareness of your needs. If you are constantly being bombarded with texts, may you need to let someone know that you are not always available for a conversation. Truly sit down with these ideas and thoughts to help yourself understand where you need more limits.

If you are struggling with creating boundaries, I have created a free worksheet that you can download to get really clear about where you need boundaries and why. For those of you who are looking to take a deep dive, my free Healthy Habits Guide may also be something for you to download!

healthy boundaries

How Can You Create Your Own Boundaries?

My favorite thing to do is to write my boundaries down. I am putting them into the universe, as well as holding myself responsible for upholding these boundaries. To create healthy boundaries, make sure you

  • Trust yourself. Know what your goals are, be confident in them!
  • Understand what your needs are and how you can fulfill them.
  • Are learning how and when to say “no” to things, people, or events that are not serving you.
  • Have the right and honor to create healthy boundaries to shift your life.

One of my favorite ways to create boundaries is using the 5 Things Method. By writing down 5 things in your life, you can create clear and organized boundaries that you can have in your life. Write 5 things that you do not want to do, want to hear, or want to even to say. You are leading your own life, and you are allowed to make the rules.

How to Protect Your Boundaries Over Time

When you first create new boundaries, make sure you are being firm in them. While it is important to be flexible and understand that boundaries change as we get older and grow, they are not changing that often. For me, reviewing my boundaries every six months has been a great way to keep them relative and under control.

Just know that you have the right to create boundaries, and it is not negative, mean, or unattractive. Respecting yourself is one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself and the universe.

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  • Ashley
    September 12, 2020

    This is an excellent guide for creating healthy boundaries! It’s a difficult thing to navigate, but so well worth doing. I’ve had to learn this the hard way (as I often do, haha) with family, but I can tell you that things have gotten better for not only me, but for my relationships with family members as well, by creating those healthy boundaries.

    Make Life Marvelous

    Reply
    • ashleestuart
      Ashley
      September 15, 2020

      I am in the same boat as you! It was not easy to start, but it has allowed me to really recover from a lot of uncomfortable situations in my past.

      Reply

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